What's Next?

As you can imagine, that was a truly tough time.  And, because we were at the meeting, we shared the news with more people than we hoped.  So, even as late as last week, I received a message from a colleague who "heard through the grapevine that we were expecting again - and Congratulations."  So, last week was 13 weeks since learning about the miscarriage.  How do you think I handled it???

I cried.  I know it's been 13 weeks, but still, it's only been 13 weeks.  As for the e-mail, I didn't respond to that part of the message.  I responded with comments on the other part, but left that part alone. 

How do you respond to that?? 

So, now what?  What do we do?  Do we try again? 

We haven't come to a final decision on that.  While we both could be done (which is a new position for my husband as he has never said anything beside he wanted more children), we are still open to the possibility of having more.  With that said, we are both getting older, and my cycles are still terrible.  So, now what?

Just this weekend we talked about whether or not to go back on the pill.  It would make my life easier, but it would mean stopping our chances of pregnancy.  What do we do?

Oh, and I haven't mentioned that I am again a few days late.  And, I took another test on Sunday morning (without my husband).  Although this time, when he walked back into the room, he asked - So what did the pregnancy test say?

Although he wasn't there, he knew it was happening. I sure do love that man!!

The test results - Not Pregnant.  And, for the first time, I could see that he was okay with that answer.  He feels full and complete.  We have our three here to hold and two waiting for us.  Just over six years ago, we thought we might never have children.  We have been pregnant 5 times and have three amazing little ones God has given us to raise.  We have truly been blessed.  We feel complete.

So, as for our next steps in fertility, I'm not sure.  I ordered the pills, but haven't taken them yet.  I think we still have some talking and praying to do.  And, even if we start the pill, if God wants us to have another baby, I know He can make it happen.