#19 - Dick Fetter & Dan McQuiston

And, as mentioned in a previous post, I know that God has placed angels along my path to help guide me along the way.  Two of those angels at Butler were two professors – Dick Fetter & Dan McQuiston.

McQ – I am so thankful for you!  When I was switching majors into Business from Pharmacy, you were my advisor.  And, the semester prior to coming into the College of Business was not one of my proudest times.  I was caught up in the trying to get the “full college experience” and since I was switching majors – I think I gave up on my sensibilities.  You helped get me back on track both personally & academically.  You helped me to see what I needed to do to get a great business education and graduate only needing one additional semester.  And, you stayed in touch to ensure I was keeping on track.  Knowing that, I didn’t want to let you down.  I focused on my classes and my grades.  I graduated with a 3.6 (almost Cum Laude) and with a job offer from Pfizer.  And, I truly wouldn’t have had that job offer without your endorsement to my first manager.  Truly, I wouldn’t be here without you!  I am so very thankful for all you did back then, and for your continued friendship, guidance & support!

Fetter – I am so thankful for you!  When I switched majors, you were one of the first professors I had for a business class.  You opened my eyes to the world of business.  What I loved about you & your class was that you were speaking from that experience.  You would teach us the textbook information, and then use your personal experience (or share an experience of another) to make those concepts come to life.  After being in your class, I knew I was in the right place!  But, I am thankful for so much more than that!  As mentioned, I wasn’t in a great place personally back then.  You noticed and you cared.  You were there to listen when I needed someone to listen –and you were there to push me when I needed someone to push me.  And, when it came time to graduate, you also gave your endorsement to my first manager.  Truly, I wouldn’t be here without you!  I am so very thankful for all you did back then, and for your continued friendship, guidance & support!

#18 - Butler University

I am so very thankful for Butler University – for my education, the faculty, my friends and so much more!  First, I received a great education at Butler.  I started in as a pharmacy major; however, the first two years were focused on providing a well-rounded liberal arts education.  And, I have relied on many of those learnings throughout my career.  I have said this many times – My Butler education not only helped me get my first job, it provided the foundation for me to be successful throughout my career!  And, as of this week – that has been a 16 year career at Pfizer where I am in my 7^th different position.  I would not be here without my Butler education.

With that said, I do dedicate time and money to Butler to give back just a little of what I gained.  I have the honor & privilege to sit on two different boards – the Alumni Association Board & the Strategic Marketing Board.  Through these boards, I have gotten to meet so many amazing Butler alumni, faculty & staff!  I also participate in the Butler Business Scholars weekends where I have the honor to speak with the parents of prospective students to share my Butler experience.  And, I then get to meet with some of the prospective students.  It is truly something I look forward to each year, and am disappointed when work responsibilities take me away from Indianapolis.  I will move almost anything on my calendar to attend these.  And, now living in the Indianapolis area – it is much easier to attend J.

I am truly so very thankful for Butler University! 

#17 - Mr. Backe & Mrs. Wright

When I think about my life and how I got here today, I know that God has placed many angels on Earth to help guide me along the way.  Two of those early angels were Mr. Backe – my 7^th grade science teacher, and Mrs. Wright – my high school guidance counselor.

Mr. Backe – I am so very thankful for you!  When I was in 7^th grade, I moved to NW IN and started a new school.  I had just left a school where it wasn’t “cool” to be smart.  In my new school, I didn’t have many friends, and I really didn’t fit in.  So, when it was time to dissect a frog, I thought – there is no way!  So, I asked you to allow me to write a paper on it instead.  And, I am so very thankful that you asked if I would just be there the first day.  If I really didn’t want to do it, you would let me go to the library and write the paper.  And, as you know – I LOVED IT!   Not really dissecting the frog, but I loved science!  And, I truly appreciated your support!  That led to taking 5 years of science in 3.5 years of high school and eventually going into pharmaceutical sales.  I wouldn’t be here without you!

And, I just realized that the “thing” that got me to love science was a FROG (Forever Rely on God)!  Amen!

Mrs. Wright – I am so very thankful for you!  You were always there for me in high school.  What I didn’t realize then is just how much that meant.  Teenage years are tough – especially for girls.  And you were always there.  You weren’t just there to help me with classes and prepare for college applications – you listened to a lot of silly girl issues that were the world to me at that time.  I cannot thank you enough for that – and all you did!  And, you helped me focus on pharmacy and eventually Butler.  I wouldn’t be here today without your guidance and I am so very thankful for you!

#16 - School & Bass Lake Friends

I am so very thankful for all of the amazing people who were in my life during my early years (and many are still a part of our lives today)!

Calumet City Friends - I am so very thankful for you!  You were there for me when I was a young, chunky, pimple-faced, thick glasses wearing goof ball.  I learned so much from you, and I am so thankful for your friendships!  I am also thankful for FaceBook to get us back connected after many years! 

Bass Lake Friends - I am so very thankful for you!  You were there for me when I was still the chunky, pimple-faced, thick glasses wearing goof ball.  I have so many wonderful memories of the summers spent on the lake skiing & tubing!  We had so much fun playing ghosts in the graveyard & movie tag :).  Drive-in movies & King Kreme for ice cream & video games.  I am so very thankful for your friendships!

Grimmer & Lake Central Friends - I am so very thankful for you!  You were there for me when I was still a chunky, pimple-faced, contact wearing goof ball.  On top of all that, I was so insecure as we moved to a new town with new people who were all friends for years.  Thank you for accepting me.  Thank you for teaching me about clothes & make-up :).  Thank you for being there as I grew up and became a young adult.  You helped me to become more confident and comfortable in my own skin. I am truly thankful for your friendships!

Sorry for the delay!

I am truly sorry for the delay in sending out notes for those who I am thankful for.  I will be continuing through December - Why should thankfulness be held to one month???

The last three weeks have been especially hectic here.  I started traveling for work again.  It was fun to see everyone, but it definitely wore me out more than I expected.  I am truly grateful for the amazing team I have the pleasure of working with - and I will dedicate a post soon to how thankful I am for them.

I also got really great news!  In January this year when I got sick, I also experienced significant muscle weakness & pain.  It happened again in March and May.  It worried me as it seemed that every time I got a fever, I could barely move my arms & legs.  That is what sent me into the doctor originally when we found the cancer. 

So, long story short (too late), I ended up having an MRI last week to see what the cause is (and to determine if I have MS).  The good news is - I don't have MS!  My brain scan was unremarkable... Praise God!!!  They did see two slipped discs in my neck (which could be the cause of my headaches), so I will be starting PT soon to see if that can be fixed. 

All in all, it has been a very good few weeks - busy, tiring & emotional, but very good!  Back to my Month(s) of Thankfulness!

#15 - Bella, Luke & Baby Boy Spangler - My Niece & Nephews!

Bella & Luke - I hope you both know how much we all love you, and how thankful we are that God brought you into our lives!

Bella - Your name was chosen perfectly for you - you are an amazingly beautiful girl!  It is hard to believe you are already 8 years old!  I remember the day you were born - you were the first grandchild for Busia & Papa.  We watched you grow from a baby, to a little girl, to an amazing young lady!  You are a great oldest cousin!  Thank you for loving & playing with Paulie & Noah.  I hope you know how much they love you and love being with you.  And, thank you for being so kind & loving to Sarah!  You are a wonderful cousin and an awesome niece!

Luke - You are such a wonderful nephew!  And, it is hard to believe you are already 7 because I remember when your mom & I were both pregnant with you and Paulie!  You have been such an amazing cousin!  Paulie & Noah love having a boy cousin to play sports, superheroes & boy stuff!  And, Sarah loves having another big boy cousin who looks out for her.  I hope you know how much they love you and love being with you.  You are a wonderful cousin & an awesome nephew!

Baby Boy Spangler - I hope we can show you how much we love you, and how thankful we are that God gave you to your mom & dad!  Your cousin Paulie prayed for many nights that God would give your parents a little baby.  We all continue to pray that you are growing & developing safely with your mom.  And, we look forward to meeting you for the first time around Christmas - we can hardly wait!  But, please stay in there until you are fully healthy and ready for us to love all over you!

Bella, Luke & Baby Boy Spangler - I hope you know how much we all love you and have very grateful we are that God brought you into our lives!!!  

#14 - Jordan & Taylor, My Nephew & Niece!

Jordan & Taylor - I hope you both know how much I love you and how thankful I am for you!

It is hard to believe that I was Taylor's age when Jordan was born, and Jordan's age when Taylor was born.  That seems like so long ago.

I loved watching you grow from babies to toddlers to little people.  You were both wonderful in our wedding - our little ring bearer & flower girl.  You both accepted Paul in right away as your uncle - and had fun beating up Uncle Paul (& maybe receiving the occasional wedgie - so sorry about that).

It has been so much fun watching you both grow up.  I am thankful for the times we have had together - during visits, holidays, vacations.  I only wish we would have lived closer so we could have spent more time together.

Jordan - you have grown into a truly amazing man.  It is hard to believe you are already in college!  Where did that time go???  I thank you that you take the time to play with the kids!  I hope you see how much the kids look up to you - especially Paulie!  You are a great cousin, and a wonderful nephew!

Taylor - you have grown into a truly amazing woman.  It is hard to believe you will be in college next year!  Seriously?!?!?!  I thank you for the time you have spent with the kids!  You have been a great cousin, babysitter & swim instructor (by the way - Noah & Paulie are both looking forward to swim lessons next Summer :).  You have also been a wonderful niece!

Jordan - I hope you know that you are always welcome at our house.  College is only 1 hour away.  If you ever need a weekend away or some family time, please come on over.  Bring your friends or just yourself.

Taylor - If you decide to go to college here in Indiana, please know you are also always welcome!  Our home is always open to you, too!

I hope you both know how much we all love you, and how grateful we are that God brought you into our lives!

#13 - My newest brothers - Mike & Ryan

Mike & Ryan - I hope you know that we love you both and we are so very thankful for you!

It is crazy how connected our families are - outside of being married to Musziks!  Just think, if my family didn't move to Indiana, we would have gone to high school together.  And then to learn that our parents knew each other (worked together, went to school together, was your mom's baby-sitter), we were meant to be family.

I thank you both for accepting us into your family.  Thank you for being wonderful husbands & fathers (Ryan, while I know it is father-to-be in December, we can already see how great of a dad you will be by the way you show your love to your nieces & nephews.  Your little one is in great hands!)  Thank you for the wonderful memories from holidays and vacations.  Thank you for being wonderful brothers & friends to us, and uncles & godparents to our children. 

I hope you know how proud we are of each of you!  Starting your own business isn't easy.  It takes a lot of work and we know you both are going to be successful!  Congratulations on opening your offices!

That said, if anyone in the Indiana / Illinois area is looking for:
 - Financial Planning / Advice - please reach out to Mike Kopec (Michigan City, IN) click here
 - Insurance - please reach out to Ryan Spangler (St. John, IN) click here

Mike & Ryan - I hope you know how much we love you and are so grateful for you!

#12 - My First Brother - Craig

Craig - I hope you know how much I love you and how very thankful I am for you!

There are so many reasons why I am grateful for you!

I always wanted a "big brother" and I am thankful God brought you into our lives.  And, you have been a wonderful big brother - you have provided guidance, given grace & shown love.  I am so very thankful for that!

While I can share the many other reasons why I am thankful for you (not including you beating me in a foot race when I was a teenager), the greatest of them all is your faith! When I think about where I am today in my walk with Christ, I know that I wouldn't be here without you.  While Tammy helped me onto that path, she had that opportunity because you helped her first.  Your relationship with Christ is a wonderful example to us all!

I also want you to know how very proud I am of you!  I know this year didn't start out as you had planned.  Many others who experience something as serious as a heart attack, turn away from faith - especially when they experience it just after starting to get their health back on track.  They could use it as an excuse to not continue on the road to health.  You, on the other hand, took this opportunity to put your health first.  You have seen God's Hand through this experience and have shared that testimony with so many others.  Your love of God and your willingness to share has brought others to Christ.

Craig - I truly hope you know how much I love you, and how grateful I am for you!

#11 - My newest sisters, Laura & Alicia

Laura & Alicia - I love you both and I hope you know how thankful I am for you!

I cannot put into words how thankful I am to have both of you in my life!  You both welcomed me into the family with open arms.  I know many friends who did not experience the love and acceptance that you both showed me.  Please know how truly grateful I am!

I always wanted to be a big sister.  I watched my two older sisters growing up and learned a great deal from them.  They were 7+ years older than me, so there wasn't much I could teach them - but I did learn so very much.  

With the three of us being so close in age, there was some things I could teach, and so many other things I was able to learn.  You welcomed my thoughts on the things I had already done and my questions on what I hadn't experienced.

Laura - There are many reasons why I am so very thankful for you.  One of those reasons is that we were able to go through pregnancy together.  You had done it first, and we went through it together the second time.  You taught me so very much during that time - and it was wonderful to have a sister to go through that experience with!  

Alicia - There are also so many reasons why I am so very thankful for you.  I am grateful that we were able to be roommates for a year (that seems like so long ago now).  I am so very thankful for that time as I feel like it helped us to grow closer.  I was able to see how truly caring you are.  You always put everyone else first - you are the most easy going person I have ever met.  I need to learn more of that from you :).

I thank you both for being such great sisters!  We have made so many amazing memories the past 14 years, and I look forward to many, many more!

Laura & Alicia - I love you both and I am so very grateful for you!

#10 - My 2nd Dad, Paul

Dad - I hope you know how much I love you and how thankful I am for you!

Thank you so very much for being such a great example of a husband.  You showed your children how a man can be both strong and sensitive.  You have always been the rock the family can count on!  Even when times were tough and you didn't know what might happen next, you stayed strong and helped the rest of the family know that everything would work out. 

That said, you also have such a wonderful, sensitive side.  These years have been filled with many emotional ups (the marriage of your three kids, the birth of your five (soon to be six) grandkids) & downs (the loss of loved ones).  You have shown that strength doesn't mean the lack of emotions.  It's actually the exact opposite. 

And, you have passed those traits onto you kids.  As you read in Paul's message, he also exhibits strength and sensitivity.  You are also an amazing example of putting your children first.  Being there for their celebrations (sporting events, school dances, other honors) and when then needed a shoulder to cry on (losing the game, dealing with a broken heart).  He is a wonderul husband and father - and that comes from the example you set for him. 

I also thank you for welcoming me into the family with open arms.  I truly feel like you look at me as a daughter instead of a daughter-in-law.

Dad - I hope you know how much I love you and how thankful I am for you!

#9 - My 2nd Mom, Patti

Mom - I hope you know that I love you and am so very thankful for you!

There are so many reasons why I am so very grateful for you!  To start, you are a wonderful mother to your three children.  You can just see the joy each one brings you even still today.  You have raised very loving children, and that is a direct reflection of the love you shared with them.

You are also a wonderful example of a mother-in-law!  I have thought about Paulie & Noah growing up and finding a woman to marry (I don't think of it too often, but I do imagine that from time to time).  I hope I can be half as good at is as you are.  You have been very patient with me throughout the years.  You immediately welcomed me into the family with open arms. I was quickly included as part of the family.  And, you have been so patient with me as I grew into being a fiance, then wife and now mother.  Thank you for your love, acceptance, grace and patience (especially when I didn't deserve it)!

You are also great "Busia" to the kids.  I hope you can see and feel how much they love you!  Thank you for all of your help & support with the kids!  And, it's not just the kids.  Your willingness to watch them allows Paul & I the time to get away and focus on our marriage.  Words cannot express how truly valuable that time is - and - how much we appreciate you!

Mom - Please know how much I love you and how truly grateful I am for you!

#8 - Our little princess, Sarah

Sarah - I hope you know how much we love you and how thankful we are for you!

You are such a blessing!  When your Dad & I wanted to add to our family, we prayed God would bless us with another baby.  What is amazing about you is that, God didn't make us wait this time - not at all. The very next month, we found out about you.

When you were still in Mommy's belly, we thought you were going to be a boy, but your biggest brother, Paulie, knew you were going to be a girl.  And, he was right!  God knew exactly what our family needed.

When you came into this world, your little lungs weren't ready to breathe on their own.  You also didn't want to wait, and you joined us 19 days before you were due.  So, just like your brother, Noah, you needed to go into a special room for the doctors & nurses to watch you all the time.  And, you didn't like light, noise or anyone touching you.  We were worried what would happen when you came home because your two brothers were anything but quiet!

We were so happy to bring you home 9 days after you were born - that meant you were home with us for Christmas - a True Christmas Miracle!  Not only that, you had learned how to handle light, noise & touch - Praise God!

We have loved watching you grow for the almost 3 years we have had you in our family.  And, I completely see why God gave us you!  You have helped me to be more patient.  You have helped me to enjoy all of the moments with the family - big or small.  You have helped me be a better mom to all three of you kids.  Thank you!

Please always remember, God loves you!  He made you special for our family - and He chose you as the perfect baby girl for us!  He has very special plans for you, and I look forward to seeing those plans come to life!

Sarah - we love you very much!  We are so very proud of the child you are!  We are truly blessed to be your parents, and we are very thankful that God gave you to us!

#7 - Our middle man, Noah

Noah - I hope you know how much we love you and how thankful we are for you!

You are an amazing little dude!  After having Paulie, your Dad and I knew we wanted to add to our family.  We prayed that God would help us have another baby.  And, almost two and a half years after Paulie was born, you came into our lives.

You definitely came in with a ROAR!  While you weren't due until August 12th, you decided you wanted to come out early - 24 days early!  Because you were born so early, your little lungs weren't developed, so you needed to go into a special room where the doctors & nurses watched you constantly.  You did so well, we were able to bring you home just 7 days after you were born.  Praise God for that!

When you were in that special room, I was able to sit and watch you.  For the first time, I understood how much babies don't know and what they all need to learn.  I watched you breathe for the first time.  I watched you eat for the first time.  These are things I just assumed little ones knew - but you helped me realize how much we needed to teach you.  And, you helped me to realize how much a mother's heart grows.

You continue to amaze me every day!  I watch as you learn new things - some by following your older brother, and some you learn on your own.  I also watch as you teach your little sister things.  You are a great leader & a great follower.

God blessed you with a loving heart and a smile that can light up even the darkest room!  Watching you grow up is a true blessing to me.

Please always remember, God loves you!  He made you special for our family - and He made you the perfect middle man for our family!  He has very special plans for you, and I look forward to seeing those plans come to life!

Noah - we love you very much!  We are so very proud of the child you are, we are truly blessed to be your parents, and we are very thankful that God gave you to us!

#6 - Our first born, Paulie

Paulie - Our biggest, bestest bubs - I hope you know how thankful I am for you (how thankful we all are for you)!

Your Dad & I prayed, and prayed, and prayed to God that we would be blessed with children.  We prayed for over two years for God to bless us with a baby.  We didn't quite know why it was so difficult for us to have a baby…until we met you.

On the day you were born, we knew why God needed us to wait - because you hadn't been created yet.  And, you were the child God had specifically chosen to be our first born.  He made you specifically for our family.  As you have gotten older, I continue to see why we needed to wait for you.  And, I am so very grateful God made us wait!

You are the perfect first born.  You are patient and kind.  You love to learn and you love to teach.  You are willing to share.  You know right from wrong and like to do the right things.  You have a wonderful sense of humor!  I am so very proud of the person you are - not for what you do - but the person you are.

I know being the oldest child comes with its challenges.  I love it that you think being the oldest child is "kind of like being a single parent." :)  While there is a significant difference, I think it's cute that you think that at almost 7 years old.  And, I am sorry to say that it will likely get tougher as you get older.

Remember this - God made you the first born for a reason.  God has very special plans for you.  He is helping you to learn and grow.  He is having you teach and share.  He made you special.  And, I am so very excited to see what His plans are for you!

Paulie - I hope you know how very proud we are of you!  We are blessed to be your parents!  We love you and we are so very thankful God gave you to us!

#5 - My husband, My love - Paul

Paul - I truly hope you know how much I love you, and how very thankful I am for you!

You are an amazing husband and best friend!  I cannot imagine a better partner to share my life with.  You are patient and kind.  You are loving.  You support me and lift me up.  And, you hold me and are my shoulder to cry on.  You have an amazing ability to be both strong and sensitive at the same time.  And, you challenge me when I need to be challenged.

I was rereading this passage this week and thought about our marriage:

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (GNB):
Love is patient and kind; it is not jealous or conceited or proud; love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable; love does not keep a record of wrongs; love is not happy with evil, but is happy with the truth. Love never gives up; and its faith, hope and patience never fail.

Thank you for putting into action what these words mean!  I love you!

I love your sense of humor!  You are such a jokester and can make even the worst situations more bearable and give me something to smile about.  And, I laugh when you "get people" with your jokes.  Seriously, haven't people realized that 85% of what you say isn't true?!?!? :)

And, you are an AMAZING father!  Our children are so very blessed to have you as their dad - their role model.  When people comment on how great our kids are, I give you ALL the credit!  You have found a way to raise respectful children who still like to have fun.

While we may not always agree, I am so very thankful that you are my partner.  You are in this with me.  And, regardless of the situation, I always know you want the best for me (and I hope you know I always want the best for you!).

There are so many other reasons why I am so very thankful for you!  Please know that I thank God each and every day that I have the honor to spend the rest of my life with you!  I love you and I am so very thankful for you!

#4 - My sister, Kim

Kim - I hope you know that I am very thankful that you are my sister!

I can list many reasons why I am thankful for you. Being the second born, you helped Mom & Dad to realize each child needs something different.  So, when I came along, it was easier for them (and for me).  You also made it easier because you treated me like your "baby" when we were younger. You always looked out for me.  Your love & support (and late night phone calls) continued through college & beyond.  And, your friendship as we have gotten older. 

While all of those are amazing things, one special thing I have learned from you is your selfless generosity.  The moment you hear anyone is in need, you are willing to drop everything to help that person - regardless of the personal cost. 

You give your time, you spend your money, you cook/bake the best food/cookies (yummy!), you open your home, you sacrifice yourself (and your sleep) - to help those in need. 

So many people in this world are focused on "What's in it for Me?".  Why should they give of their time, money, gifts to help others?  What do they get from it?  And, what else would they have to sacrifice?  Not you!  You focus on what you can do to help others - regardless of the cost and recognition.

Kim - I hope you know I love you and am truly thankful that you are my sister!

#3 - My Sister, Tammy

Tammy – I hope you know how blessed I am to have you as my sister!   

I can list many reasons why it was so wonderful having you as my oldest sister.  You were a great student.  You were very involved in other activities and found a way to balance it all.  You were the first in our family to go to college.  You had an internship that turned into a full-time position before you even graduated.  You were the first to get married, the first to have a child (and then another). 

Many younger siblings can say that about the oldest sibling in their family – the oldest one did everything first. 

Here is my favorite first – your relationship with Christ & sharing that with me.

You started on this journey first.  You showed me the true relationship Christ wants with each of us, individually.  You showed me what it meant to love Christ with all of your heart and to put Him first, always.  You helped me onto the path, you helped me realize when I have fallen of the path and when I jumped off the path, and you helped me get right back on again. 

My faith is my North Star.  It is what guides me and what keeps me grounded, focused, humble, & grateful.  And, most importantly, my relationship with Christ helps me to prayerfully make better decisions – at home, with friends, with volunteer opportunities, at work, etc.  I am a better daughter, sister, wife, mother, friend & colleague.   

Tammy – I am so very thankful you helped me to see how AMAZING a true relationship with Christ is!  I love you and I am so very grateful for you!

#2 - My Dad

Dad – I hope you know that I am so very thankful for you!  And, in writing this, I realize I don’t tell you this often enough.  For that, I am sorry!

When I was younger, you always pushed us to strive for our best.  Good wasn't good enough - not if we could do better.  And, while I didn't appreciate it then, I can see how much that has benefited me as an adult - and how much it is appreciated. 

I am also so very thankful that you allowed me to watch you build & fix things.  Whether it was fixing a running toilet or putting together furniture, you always allowed me to be there, to help you and to learn.  That has be so very helpful throughout my life (even tonight as we finished putting Sarah's bedroom set together).  Now, if you would just teach me how to fix a doorbell (don't worry - it still works :))!

You taught me how to stand up for myself and not let others bring me down.  You taught me to be confident and courageous - especially during the times when it can be a little scary. 

You taught me the importance of working hard and not just doing the job, but doing it right.  Why do it at all if someone is going to need to do it over???

And, both you & Mom taught me that, no matter what - you always love us, you are always proud of us, and we always have a place at home.

Dad, I hope you know how very thankful I am to have you as a dad!  I love you very much!

#1 - My Mom

Today is my birthday.  And, what better day could there be to share my thanks for my mom than on the day that she gave me birth!?!?!

Mom – I hope you know that I am so very thankful for you!  I always knew that you loved me, but it wasn’t until I had children of my own that I fully grasped the depths of your love.  Thank you doesn't seem to be enough to share how much I truly appreciate your constant, unwavering, never-ending love.  Even today, I know you feel that same way.  Truly, Thank You!

I also hope you know that I would not be the woman I am today without your love, support and guidance.  You knew you wanted all three of us to go to college, to get a good degree, get a good job, and to be independent women.  You helped to keep us focused on the future – not just what was fun for the moment.   I am certain I didn't always appreciate that when I was younger, but I am forever grateful for that now!

You were there to celebrate our successes and with a hug and great pep-talk when we didn’t achieve our goals.  You shared your pride in us as people.  Your love was not based on what we accomplished but rather the women we are. 

Even when we made poor choices, you were always there!  You let us know you were disappointed in our decisions – and that you still loved us.  That helped us make better decision in the future.

Mom, thank you for being a great mom!  I love you and am very thankful for you!

Month of Thanks!

A couple of years ago, each day I chose one person / group of people that I am thankful for and shared that thanks on Facebook.  This year, I would love to use this blog to share those thanks!


















Starting tomorrow, I will be giving thanks each day.  Before I start, I want to share "why" I am doing it.  You see, I have so very much to be thankful for! 

We often can get so caught up in this life on climbing the ladder, finding the newest opportunity, striving for excellence.  When doing so, we can lose sight on some very important things:
 - We didn't get there on our own.  Others helped us to learn, grow & develop.
 - Those who helped us deserve recognition & thanks!  Even if they don't want it - they deserve it!
 - No matter what you think about your success thus far (you can think you are amazing or still have tons to learn), there are others out there who would do anything to get where you are, to learn from you
 - It's your turn!  Yes, right now, you have the opportunity to help, share, develop others!  Someone out there thinks you are AMAZING!  Likely, many people believe you are AMAZING!  It's time to "Pay it Forward!"
 - Last, and most importantly, God has given you gifts and placed other people & experiences on your path to help you develop those gifts.  And, I believe He wants us to share those gifts with others.  Here is one of the passages that reinforces that belief:

Romans 12:6-8 (GNB):
So we are to use our different gifts in accordance with the grace that God has given us.  If our gift is to speak God's message, we should do it according to the faith that we have; if it is to serve, we should serve; if it is to teach, we should teach; if it is to encourage others, we should do so.  Whoever shares with others should do it generously; whoever has authority should work hard; whoever shows kindness to others should do it cheerfully.

I look forward to sharing my many thanks with those who have helped me to get to where I am today.  And, while I am very proud of what I have been able to accomplish, I know the best is still yet to come...

He Knows My Name by Francesca Battistelli:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=haLkLDfLBok


Father,

I thank You for loving me - even when I was unlovable.  I thank You for forgiving me - especially when what I did was unforgivable.  I thank You for choosing me - even though I should have been the last one chosen (if chosen at all).  And, I know that You had chosen a plan for me, I thank You for still believing in me!

Please allow me to use this blog this month to give thanks to all of those You have brought into my life and helped me to become the person I am today.  And, thank You for all of those still yet to come.

In Jesus' name!
AMEN!

Back to Work

I can hardly believe how quickly those four weeks flew by!  This past Tuesday was my first day back to work post-surgery.  I remember this feeling when coming back to work from maternity leave after each baby.  The first few weeks, I felt completely overwhelmed.  It seemed like so much had changed during my absence – and the task of getting through all of the emails felt impossible!   But then, I got back into the swing of things.  And, within 2-3 weeks, I felt like I was never off.  Since this leave was much shorter (4 weeks vs. 14 weeks), it only took a few days to feel like I was never off (still need a few days to be fully back in the swing of things).

The other difference is – when I came back to work after having a baby, most people knew why I was on leave.  And, if they didn’t know, it was fun to share, show pictures, and brag on our newest little addition to our family. 

This time – it’s AWKWARD (I am hearing my niece’s voice when I right that word J).

Truly, it is much different.  I was only off for four weeks, and work has been hectic, so I don’t know if my absence was truly noticed.  If it was noticed, I am not sure if they know why I was gone.  Here are a couple of examples of “awkward” situations:

-          A former boss called the other day.  I thought he was calling because I was back to work.  He asked “how are you?” so I assumed that he knew.  So I said, “Great!  Pathology was clear – Praise God!  So, I am happy to be back to work and moving forward.”   What followed was…COMPLETE SILENCE!  He didn’t know.  It had been a while since we talked (again, former boss), so it makes complete sense that he wouldn’t know.  So, as you can imagine, the rest of the call was…AWKWARD!
-          After that experience, I decided I wasn’t going to bring it up unless the other person did.  So, I had one phone call and one live meeting with people I haven’t connected with in 6+ months.  They didn’t bring it up, so neither did I.  Now, I am worried that they will find out and wonder why I didn’t tell them – UGH!

Just like my children didn’t come out with “Owner’s Manuals” on how to raise them to be the best God-loving, respectable, kind and independent adults, I didn’t leave the hospital with a “users guide” for talking about this (or not talking about this) with others. 

WOULD SOMEONE PLEASE WRITE THAT PLEASE??  MAKE IT EASIER FOR ALL THOSE WHO WILL FOLLOW?

 With all that in mind, here is what I can offer today:

-          If you know someone who has / has had cancer, let them know that you know.  You can say something like, “I heard about your diagnosis.  Please know you are in my thoughts / prayers.  I am sure you have talked about it a lot, so I am happy to talk about that or other topics.  Just know I am here.” 
-          If you have a conversation with someone who has / has had cancer and you didn’t know – PLEASE DON’T BE OFFENDED!  It is a hard topic to bring up – believe me, it doesn’t just “come up” in conversations.  And, there usually isn’t a good time to share it.
-          If you know someone who has / has had cancer and you didn’t reach out – IN MY OPINION, there is no need to apologize!  At least for me, I know that you care.  I am thankful for the kind thoughts or prayers.  And, our friendship is not based on how much we have connected during this process.  I love you just as much today as I did before this whole ordeal.  At least for me, no apology needed J!
 

Father,

     I thank You for all of Your blessings through this journey.  You ensured we found the cancer early, You ensured we had the right doctors & treatments, You ensured we had the best family & friends for support, and You cured me! 
     Please help me to find the words to share this experience in a way that glorifies You.  I pray that You allow me the honor to use this testimony to help bring others into Your kingdom. 

In Jesus’ name,
AMEN!

10/17 Update

Sorry - I should have sent this on Friday.  It's been a fun & busy weekend with family in town.  And, while we couldn't bring in a Notre Dame win (still think that was a very questionable call), it was a great weekend.

Update:
We saw the oncologist on Friday for a  post-op appointment.  She was very pleased with the surgery, the healing, and re-confirmed that the pathology was clear - no radiation / no chemotherapy!  I'm Cancer-Free!!!  PRAISE GOD!!! 

She recommended I go back to my original GYN in 6-months for a follow-up test.  Depending on those results, I will either need to go back every 6 months or annually for a few more years. 

To everyone reading this - THANK YOU!  Whether you brought us a meal, sent flowers / card, called/ sent a text, added us to a prayer list, prayed, etc. - you are all part of this journey.  And, we cannot thank you enough for all of the love, support and prayers! 

That said, I know I need to share the following:

It's My Fault:
There are many different kinds of cancer that start in various parts of the body - most of them without any understanding of the cause.  That's not my story...

We all know that God wants us to "save ourselves" for marriage.. for us to keep the marriage bed pure.  Here are two verses on the topic (there are many others...)

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 (GNB):
Avoid immorality.  Any other sin a man commits does not affect his body; but the man who is guilty of sexual immorality sins against his own body.
Don't you know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and who was given to you by God?  You do not belong to yourself but to God; He bought you for a price.  So use your bodies for God's glory.

Hebrews 13:4 (GNB):
Marriage is to be honored by all, and husbands and wives must be faithful to each other.  God will judge those who are immoral and those who commit adultery.

Unfortunately, my husband and I didn't come into our marriage pure.  So, even though we have been fully faithful to each other for our entire marriage and we know that God has forgiven us for those sins - it doesn't mean that He took away the consequences for those actions.

While most people think about the consequences of heart break, pregnancy and STDs - most people don't think about cancer...

My cancer was caused by HPV.  That virus made changes in my cervix that turned into a very aggressive form of cancer.  And, had it not be found and treated quickly, it would have spread rapidly throughout my body.

I am a LUCKY ONE:
Here is the good news through all of this - I am a Lucky One!
 - We found it early
 - It was cured
 - I have a great job with benefits to allow for time off & cover most costs
 - I have great family, friends & faith to get us through this journey

Think about it -
 - How many others don't have insurance (or good insurance) so they don't go to the doctor to have the check-ups? 
 - How many others find it later leading to additional treatments, and may never hear the words - Cancer-Free?
 - How many others find out they have cancer, but they cannot afford the time off or the treatments?
 - How many others go through this without a great support system? 
 - How many others pull away from God at the time when they need Him the most?

I have to own this...It was my fault!  And, while I am still not 100% sure what God's plans are for me, I do believe this is part of that journey - to share this experience to help others make better choices and not have to experience this for themselves.

My message today is this (especially for those entering ages when sex is accepted and expected) -
STAY PURE! WAIT FOR MARRIAGE - It is WORTH IT!

And, I say this from a place of experience on the opposite side.  I didn't save myself.  And, while I experienced the sadness and heart break, I had no idea my choices would potentially take my life.  How sad would it be that I could bring three amazing children into this world, but not see them grow up because of my own poor choices???

And, when others say that saving yourself isn't important, the Bible was written for a different time, that just isn't even possible in the 2000s, remember these two things:

Romans 12:2 (GNB):
Do not conform yourselves to this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind.  Then you will be able to know the will of God - what is good and is pleasing to Him and is perfect.

Matthew 7:13-14 (GNB):
"Go in through the narrow gate, because the gate to hell is wide and the road that leads to it is easy, and there are many who travel it.  But, the gate to life is narrow and the way that leads to it is hard, and there are few people who find it. 

Others will say things to make themselves feel better about their poor choices.  I say this also from experience.  When you see others making better choices, it hurts.  It's like looking in the mirror and not liking what you see.  So, you can either accept the choices you have made and change - or - you can take the easier road...You can make fun of those making better choices to try to bring them down.

And, if you have already made a choice that you regret - pray, ask God for forgiveness, and make better choices from now on.  That's the amazing thing about our loving, forgiving God - He has the amazing ability to forgive and to set you back on the path to His plans.


Father,

I again come to You today in Thanksgiving!  Thank You for loving me, for forgiving me, and for seeing me through this latest journey.  I pray the words I shared today helps someone not fall off of Your path as I did - or helps someone get back on the path as I did.

I pray You continue to help me make the right choices that are pleasing to You.  I know You have a plan for each one of us - and I am truly grateful for Your forgiveness so that I still have the opportunity to see that plan come to life. 

In Jesus' Name!

Amen

The How...

I will say that this post has been on my mind for the past week.  Since I wrote the last one, I have been praying about this one.  I even started doing research on the Internet about "the how."

Let me just say...I was starting to stress out. 

Then, my friend posted the following on Facebook:

After reading this, it hit me - This entire blog has been about my journey.  So, this post should be about my "how."  There are many other opportunities to read what others say about "how" to build a deeper relationship with Christ. 

So, here are the three ways I started to build a deeper relationship with God:  Reading, Listening, Praying!

Reading:  If we want to "know" Him, we need to learn about Him!
When I first started this journey, I wasn't ready to jump in with both feet and read The Bible.  I wasn't sure I would understand it.  So, I started with a few book series:
 - The Left Behind Series by LaHaye & Jenkins
 - The Firstborn Series by Karen Kingsbury
 - The Noticer Returns by Andy Andrews (this is more of a recent find - and it's a great one!)

These were great starts that read like novels and pull you in.  They have great messages that are shared in ways that anyone would love the books. 

Some authors I found later in my journey that write amazing books are:
Chip Ingram
 - Living on the Edge
 - God - As He Longs for You to See Him
 - The Genius of Generosity
Andy Stanley
 - How to Be Rich
 - The Principle of the Path

And, here are three other great finds:
 - Jesus Calling by Sarah Young - a great daily devotional
 - Pocket Prayers by Max Lucado - another great 40-day devotional I just found
 - YouVersion Bible (found in any App Store)
    ---Here, you can change versions, set up reading plans, etc.

Regardless of the amount of time we have each day - five minutes or many hours - there are endless options to help each one of us gain a greater understanding of God...and what He wants for us!

Listening:  We are surrounded by messages on consumerism.  We should want MORE, BIGGER, FASTER, NEWER, SHINIER, etc.  And, we should want all of that NOW!  Actually, we should already have it.  And, if you don't have the money, there is a payment plan, a credit card, a financing deal, etc. 

Not only that, but think about what we watch on TV, read about, hear on the radio - most of it is not fit for eyes & ears of little ones.  So, what does that say about adults?  If kids shouldn't see it, why should we?  Just because we can - does that mean we should? 
 - Does this make us more likely to make good decisions or bad ones? 
 - Does it help us stay on the narrow path or make the wider, easier path more acceptable?

When we are surrounded by those messages all day, every day, it is difficult to understand that this is not what God had intended for us. 

Romans 12:2 (GNB):  Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind.

There are several ways to start listening to other messages:
Music: 
 - FM Radio:  K-Love or Air1 are both great Christian Contemporary Radio stations with great songs!
 - XM 63 - The Message (plays the same songs as the stations above)

Great Pastors to Listen to:
 - FM Radio - these are usually in the high 80's or low 90's on FM
 - XM 131 - Family Talk
 - TV Stations: CBN, TBN, others
 - I love listening to Andy Stanley, Chip Ingram, Joyce Meyer, Dr. Charles Stanley, Beth Moore and many others. 

When I started to spend more time surrounding myself with Christian messages - either in the form of song or through Bible teachings - I realized how much time I spent filling my mind with things other than what God had wanted.  And, I saw how those things effected my decisions and my attitude.

The more I heard, the more I wanted to hear.
The more I learned, the more I wanted to learn.
The Bible became the Living Word - not a book written thousands of years ago.

Praying:  To truly be in conversation with God.  To seek Him first in all you do and ask for His guidance and direction.

This is truly a place where I long to get better.  A friend and I were joking the other day about how easy it is to pray BOLDLY for others, and how difficult it is to pray BOLDLY for ourselves. 

And, it is easy to pray when things are good and to give God praise.  But what happens when everything isn't going well? 

Here is a great song about that:  Fall Apart by Josh Wilson
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKISYTwnn0A

From what I read, God wants us always.  In the good times and the bad.  In the easy time and the hard times.  He longs for us to talk to Him like we would talk to our Earthly Father.  And, here is His promise:

John 15:7 (GNB):  If you remain in Me and My words remain in you, then you will ask for anything you wish, and you shall have it.

I started the Pocket Prayers by Max Lucado because I want to deepen my relationship with God.  And, I know the way to do that is through prayer.  So, I'm on day 5 of 40 - working on deepening my relationship with God.


All this being said - there are many ways to build a deeper relationship with God.  My ways were reading, listening & praying.  And, I say all this with that Facebook post in mind - "I am not holier than thou.  I'm just a simple sinner who received God's good grace - somehow!"


Father,

I am so very thankful for the ways You have helped me draw closer to You.  I thank You for the many gifts You have given to Your children:
 - The gift of writing about You so we can know You
 - The gift of song so we can hear of Your Greatness
 - The gift of delivery so we can know The Bible is The Living Word
 - The gift of connection so that we can see how glorious a life with You can be!

I pray for Your continued help, support and guidance. I pray You help me to seek You first - always.  And, I pray You help me to see all of the amazing wonders You have given us on Earth that prove Your existence and Love!

In Jesus' name,
Amen!

Religion - Belief - Faith - Relationship... What's the Difference?

In a recent conversation, we were discussing the difference between Religion - Belief - Faith & Relationship with Christ.  After our conversation, I was encouraged to write about it. 

Who...me?  Write about that?  I am definitely not qualified to write on that!  I have my thoughts & opinions on that, but I am definitely not an expert on that. 

But, I was asked to give it some prayerful thought - so, I did.  I asked God to help direct me - to post / not to post.  And, if I were to post, what should be included? 

Soon thereafter, I started to receive messages (they were always there - I guess I just started noticing them):
 - Christian Movies:  God's Not Dead, Holy Ghost, Son of God, Heaven is for Real, & many others
 - The Good Wife - Christian Mediation
 - Left Behind Movie (Special call out because this is currently at theatres)

The last one hit me the most because as soon as I was done praying - I sat in bed and turned on the TV - and the movie trailer was on the screen.  And, in the book (probably in the movie, too) a pastor is not taken up by The Rapture.  So, that one really got me thinking about the differences.  Talk about an answer to a prayer!

So, while I am not an expert on the topic, here are some of the highlights from our discussion.

First - The four words are not mutually exclusive.  A person can participate in all four at the same time.  So, what I am going to share is my thoughts on the differences between each.

Religion (Dictionary.com): a specific fundamental set of beliefs and practices generally agreed upon by a number of persons or sects
To me - this is the outward expression of belief.  This would include things like going to church, wearing a cross, following a specific denominational "code of conduct" (ex.  Catholics not eating meat on Fridays during lent), etc. 

Often, deeper belief, faith & relationship lead to a more visible signs of religion - a tighter adherence to beliefs & practices.

Belief (Dictionary.com): something believed; an opinion or conviction
To me - belief is where it all begins.  Belief is the accepting of something that cannot easily be proven.  Here are some examples of questions on belief:

As a Christian, do I believe that Jesus is the Son of God?  Do I believe He was sent down from Heaven by God to die on the cross for my sins?  Do I believe that I am filled with the Holy Spirit?  Unequivocally - YES!

And, while I do think some people can have religion without belief (going through the motions without much thought or action), I do not believe that a person can have faith or a relationship without belief.  (Spoiler Alert - In Left Behind, this is why the pastor believed he was "left behind."  He knew all the right things.  He did the right things, but wasn't in relationship with Christ.)

Faith (Dictionary.com):  the obligation of loyalty or fidelity to a person, promise, engagement, etc.
To me, faith is taking belief to the next level.  I can believe that Jesus is the Son of God, but do I have faith in His teachings?  Do I trust that it is true?  Will I change my behavior based on it?

Here is how I differentiate faith & belief in a different context - I can believe the plane I am boarding has the ability to get me to my destination.  That said, do I have faith that it actually will get me there safely?  Or, I think of it like this.  I can have a belief - but, will I step out on faith?

Relationship (Dictionary.com):  a connection, association, or involvement.
Think about those words. 
 - I have a connection with Jesus. 
 - I am associated with Jesus. 
 - I am involved with Jesus. 

If those statements are true, would you act differently?  Would you pray differently?  Would you seek Him first in all situations?  

Think about it - He is all-knowing, all-powerful and ever-present.  Who best to talk with first prior to any decision but Him?

The gospels have a great deal to say about Jesus and Heaven.  Here are two from Matthew:

Matthew 7:21-27 (GNB):
"Not everyone who calls me 'Lord, Lord' will enter the Kingdom of Heaven, but only those who do what My Father in Heaven wants them to do.  When Judgment Day comes, many will say to Me, 'Lord, Lord!  In Your name we spoke God's message, by Your name we drove out many demons and performed many miracles!'  Then I will say to them, 'I never knew You.  Get away from Me, you wicked people!'
"So then, anyone who hears these words of Mine and obeys them is like a wise man who built his house on a rock.  The rain poured down, the rivers overflowed, and the wind blew hard against that house.  But it did not fall, because it was built on rock.
"But anyone who hears these words of Mine and does not obey them is like a foolish man who built his house on sand.  The rain poured down, the rivers overflowed, the wind blew hard against that house, and it fell.  And what a terrible fall that was!"

Think about what Jesus is saying - "I never KNEW you."  It is beyond works & good deeds.  He is asking for a relationship.  A true connection.  It is emphasized in the next verse.

Matthew 19: 16-17 (GNB):
Once a man came to Jesus.  "Teacher," he asked, "what good thing must I do to receive eternal life?"
"Why do you ask Me concerning what is good?" answered Jesus.  "There is only One who is good.  Keep the commandments if you want to enter life."

So, when I read these passages, the way I interpret them is that there is a difference.  And - it is…

HUGE!!!!!  

Based on this, Christ is asking for a relationship.  He wants to "Know" us.  That is how our names are written in The Book of Life.

Since this is already a long one, I will focus my next post on my thoughts on "how" to be in a relationship with Christ.  Again - just my thoughts, based on what I have read and my interpretation.

Lord,

I again come to You with many Thanks!  Thank You for opening my eyes to Your Word.  Thank You for helping to provide me the courage and knowledge to share my thoughts on this very important topic.  Thank You for allowing me the opportunity to share these thoughts with others.

During these next few days, I will pray about my next post - the "how" to be in relationship with You.  I pray that You continue to open my eyes, my ears and my heart to Your Word.  I pray You help me find the right words, right passages, right messages to share Your Voice with others.

Amen!

What I have learned...

As I sit here tonight, I am still in a bit of shock.  These past 8 weeks have seemed to fly by and seemed to be moving in slow motion - both at the same time.  It's been a physical, emotional and spiritual journey leading me to this - I am now Cancer-Free.

I say that knowing that I am not completely "out of the woods" so to speak.  I will need to go back for tests every 3-6 months to ensure the cancer has not started in other places, but for now - as I sit here typing - I am Cancer-Free!

With that said, a great friend and mentor asked me this question:

What Have You Learned Through This Journey?

 

So, I have been thinking about that question these past few days - What Have I Learned??  Here are a two things that keep coming to mind:

 

1 - Attitude is Everything!  Keep My Focus on God!

People have asked - How do you do it?  You seem to stay so positive. 

I am truly not 100% certain how to answer this question.  All I know is that I have continued to only focus on that which I can control and give the rest to God.  And, I didn't take it back (I have the habit of giving Him something and then within 30 minutes, taking it right back...)

 

Matthew 11:28-30 (GNB):  "Come to Me, all of you who are tired from carrying heavy loads, and I will give you rest.  Take My yoke and put it on you, and learn from Me, because I am gentle and humble in spirit; and You will find rest.  For the yoke I will give you is easy, and the load I will put on you is light."

 

By focusing only on what I could control and giving the rest to God, I truly felt light.  When people would ask questions about things I couldn't control, I didn't engage in those questions.  I replied - "That is the protocol" or "I can't control that" or "I trust God has that covered." 

 

Even as I type this, I know it is easier said than done.  It takes practice...lots of practice.  And, it takes support.  Many people aren't used to having these conversations.  Think about it, it is easier to talk about the bad, the scary, the difficult instead of the happy, the hopeful, the easy.  The latter aren't the most interesting conversations to have.  But, the Bible says this:

 

Romans 12:2 (GNB): Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world, but let God transform you inwardly by a complete change of your mind.  Then you will be able to know the will of God - what is good and pleasing to Him and is perfect.

 

2 - I Have A Lot More to Learn

I say this because, I am not 100% certain what I have learned during this journey.  I don't have a Bible verse for this one, but I have a section of the Bible - Genesis 37-50 - The Life of Joseph.  You may also have seen the play / movie - Joseph & the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat.  Here is why this is so relevant.

 

Quick aside - we bought the kids a 365 days of Bible Stories book several months ago.  Unfortunately, due to my travel, we just recently made it out of Genesis. 

 

So, here is how it relates...

We were reading the stories about Joseph.  And, we talked about how Joseph was always loyal to God, no matter what terrible situations he found himself in (to no fault of his own):

 - Thrown in a ditch by his brothers

 - Sold into slavery by his brothers

 - Thrown in jail due to a lie from Potiphar's wife

 

No matter what, Joseph was always faithful.  He knew God had a plan for him.  And, he knew God would make that plan known when the time was right. 

 

Joseph went through many trials.  And, God was always there, helping to make the best of every situation.  And, allowing each situation to prepare Joseph for His plan - saving Egypt (and the entire region) from famine and serving the King.

 

So, after these stories, I said to our oldest child - "You see, just like God had a special plan for Joseph, He has a special plan for your life, too.  That doesn't mean life will be easy, it means that God will take even the most difficult situations and help you grow and learn through them.  Each of those times (all the good and all the tough) will help to prepare you for the plans He has for you.  You are special in His eyes.  He has a special plan for you.  And, I can hardly wait to watch that unfold."

 

With all that said, I came to bed and thought about my journeys.  Each of my toughest times were followed by some of my greatest experiences.  He has used each experience to help me learn and grow.  So, while I know this has taught me to:

 - Keep my focus on God

 - Control what is controllable and give the rest to God

 - Keep a Positive Attitude

 

I also know that there are many other things this experience has taught me.  Some will become more apparent in the short-term, and others won't be realized until much later. 

 

All in all, I do know this.  God has a very special plan for me.  I can hardly wait to see what it is!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lord,

 

I have so many reasons to be thankful.  Thank You for giving me the courage and words for this blog - not just this post, but for the entire blog.  You nudged me a year ago to start putting my thoughts into writing.  Little did I know that this would be my saving grace.  You knew it all along.  You kept nudging me until I did it. I am so very grateful for that!

 

And, Lord, thank You for Your Strength through this most recent journey.  While not written in the Bible, it is often said that You will not give us more than we can handle.  I do believe that - because You never expect us to handle anything alone.  Your Strength can handle anything & everything.  When we give it to You, You can handle it all.  Thank You for that!

 

Finally, Lord, I know You have a special plan for each and every one of us.  And, I know that You will use each situation we are in to help build and mold and strengthen us - to prepare us for Your plan.  (Jeremiah 29:11 (GNB):  I alone know the plans I have for you, plans to bring you prosperity and not disaster, plans to bring about the future you hope for.)  Lord, I fully accept each situation, knowing it prepares me for the future You have planned for me.  And, I ask that You help open my eyes, my ears, and my heart to see, hear and understand the teaching of each situation.

 

I Love You and I Thank You! 

 

Amen!



UPDATE: Praise God & Prayer Request

When I came home on Wednesday, I was physically feeling okay.  Sore, but okay.  The challenge was I was preparing myself for the next week of an emotional roller coaster.  When I left the hospital, I was told that it would be 7-10 days before the pathology would come back.  That information would determine my next steps.
 - If clear, no radiation / no chemotherapy
 - If not, well…

So, I tried to give it to God.  This again wasn't anything I could control.  The surgery went well, the doctor felt that everything looked good.  She even told my dad and husband that the first procedure (done in early August) may have gotten everything.  We would just need to wait for pathology.

Thursday morning, I was still in bed when the phone rang.  My husband answered the phone and came upstairs a few moments later.  It was the doctor.  She called with the pathology -

ALL CLEAR!  CLEAR PATHOLOGY!  NO RESIDUAL CANCER!

HALLELUJAH!  PRAISE GOD!  

While we were always hopeful for that result, we were trying to prepare for any result possible.  When we heard the news, tears were streaming from our eyes.  STREAMING!

And, I froze.  I couldn't speak.  I couldn't move.  I laid there praying to / praising God!  He did it!  Even if the results were different, He would have still been there through it.  But, that was not my story.  He did it!  He cured me.  Praise God!

In very short order, I started sending emails, texts, posts, to share the good news with all those who had been sending up prayers.  It worked!  Hallelujah!  Praise God!  And, Thank You to all of those who took the moment to pray - it worked!

So, here are the next steps:
 - I meet with the doctor in two weeks to discuss the results
 - I will need repeat paps every 3-6 months for the next couple of years to ensure the cell changes aren't anywhere else

Words cannot describe how grateful I am for everyone's love, support & prayers!  I will be forever thankful for everyone!  FOREVER THANKFUL!

So……  Why is there a prayer request in my post title?

Because, we have all seen the power of prayer.  We have seen it time and time again.  And, I have a friend who could really use prayer support.

PRAYER REQUEST:
My friend, Tammy, has been going through a great deal with her own cancer diagnosis.  She recently had another surgery and had post-op complications.  She was home doing better until yesterday.

She was rushed to the hospital with blood clots in her lungs and was placed on a ventilator.  From what I understand, this morning, she may be off of the ventilator, but is still in critical condition.

Lord, 

Please be with Tammy right now.   Please be with the doctors and nurses to make the right diagnosis, provide the right treatment, and give her the right support.  Please be with her family & friends right now to help them provide the best help and love.  And, please be with Tammy right now - help her to breathe, help her to heal. 

Lord, Tammy has been and is still a very faithful follower.  Please hear our prayers.  Please heal her.  Please, Lord, help her.

10/1 Update

Good morning!  And, it is a very good morning!  Praising God for seeing us through yesterday's surgery and for a somewhat good night's sleep.  Here is the update:

Surgery went well.  The doctor spoke with my husband and dad after the surgery and feels very confident they got it all - Praying boldly for that!  If that is the case, that means no chemotherapy / radiation.  If not, we will discuss next steps.

After surgery, I was definitely sleepy & in some pain.  The nurses were able to get my pain medicines in sync, so that has helped.  And, between the vital checks, blood draws, etc. - I was able to catch up on some sleep.

We talked with the doctors this morning (fellow & residents) - I will be able to go home today.  The doctor will call in 7-10 days with the pathology results and next steps.  Then, I will see her in ~2 weeks for post-op visit.

And, the nurse just came in and said I can go home in the next hour or so (by 10am) - Yeah!  That is wonderful news!

I cannot tell you how much the calls, texts, e-mails, Facebook posts, etc. means to me. Thank you to my friends & family who have also sent out prayer requests to their prayer circles.   I am truly overwhelmed by the love, support and prayers from everyone!  Sincerely - thank you!

There are two things I want to share in closing. 
1.  The first is a verse from Romans - I love it as it speaks of faith, hope and patience.

Romans 8:25 (GNB):  But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.

2.  The second is a song that I have relied on the past few weeks.  While there are many Christian songs that have helped, this is the one that I have set on repeat.  I know that I cannot do any of this without Christ - Philippians 4:13.  (I love the words - not so sure the video content fits :))
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=knuHDPbE5es


Father,

I thank You for being with the doctor & staff yesterday during my surgery.  I thank You for helping her to see what she needed to see, cut where she needed to cut and leave what was meant to be left.  I thank You for being with me through this process, keeping my focus on You and for providing me strength. 

I pray for strength these next 7-10 days while waiting for the pathology report.  I pray for a clean report - with no additional cancer.  I pray that the future tests are also clear and cancer-free.  And, if that is not the case, I fully accept the next steps and know that You are with me. 

Thank You for Your Strength!  Thank You for Your Love! 

Amen